It was Saturday of Labor Day Weekend 2021 when we went to the emergency room and found out you had a tumor on the head of your pancreas. Fifteen months later you were gone. Flash forward two years to the same weekend, and I am having the same endoscopic procedure you had to get the biopsy that would confirm your tumor was cancer and place a stent. Only in my case it is to remove a suspicious polyp in my ampulla, which is where the pancreatic duct and bile duct join the duodenum in the first part of the small intestine. I too will have to have a stent put in to keep everything flowing. It seems surreal that this is happening to me at this time and in this place in my body.
But in a way, I feel your presence in all of this. Your experience made me want to be aggressive to get myself checked out; and as a result, it appears mine has been caught early enough to remove it before infecting my body with cancer. So maybe this is a kind of gift to help me make the most of a second chance that you didn’t get. Also, having gone through everything with you, I know what to expect, so it’s not so scary.
I wish it was you that would be beside me when I awake in the recovery room after the procedure. Perhaps I’ll dream about you while I’m asleep.
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